Beau’s girlfriend’s name is Emma and she’s also Ali’s uni friend Emma and she’s at drinks in Newtown tonight and I’m not and SHE IS REPLACING ME I KNOW IT

My dog is so addicted to the damn heater he pretty much sits on top of it　

Feeling super proud of myself because I know all the words in this clip-episode of the Simpsons because when I got my first iPod I downloaded like every Simpsons song ever

I walked past a girl at uni today wearing a knitted jumper with Morrissey’s face on it.

Oh, Sydney Uni. You so cray.

I posted an obligatory “happy birthday” message on my cousin’s wife’s wall and now all my relatives are having a conversation via my wall post UGH

Rob does this thing where he pretends to be dead and stops breathing, and then gets angry at me for not worrying/noticing. He relates it to a fire drill, and says that in the case of his sudden, silent death, I would continue fucking around for 5 minutes before I even noticed and ergo I’m the worst girlfriend of all time.　

How to make shitty history essays better:

• Have a bet with your friends to see who gets the lowest mark.
• Winner/loser gets a tub of ice cream　

I had this really weird dream last night where I was buying tickets to Coldplay in the presale and instead of just being like “how many tickets do you want ok you owe us 3 million dollars” it was like a questionnaire form and you had to fill out why you deserved to have Coldplay tickets and every time I was just about finished and I had a really good answer the computer crashed and I didn’t get Coldplay tickets and Rob’s birthday was ruined and for some reason Harry had a better answer than me and got tickets and it sucked